the "one"
met up with LeeYin and Tang for dinner last night at Seah Im hawker...
we had a good long chat about work life...relationships..it was a sthg like a "best practice" sharing session among guys...
Tang brought up the issue about "how do we know if we have met the "one"?, how do we know that we have chosen the right person?"
what i took back from the session is that somewhere out there...yes...there is a person who is a perfect match for everyone of us (i'd really like to believe that too)...but if it becomes the basis on which we search for our other half...i'd say we be forever running around in circles (unless of course you are the kind who strikes 4D every wkend)
nobody's perfect...if we keep hoping the next one will be better...when will it ever end? instead of being dulan or blaming yourself about making the "wrong" choice or that you might make the wrong choice, why not spend the effort on making things work right from the start?
we are not living in a fairy tale...there WILL be times when couples quarrel...there WILL be times when couples encounter issues which they don't agree on...there WILL be habits we have which your other half will hate...
i'm not saying we just pick anyone off the streets and say "hey let's start a relationship...if anything screws up along the way...we can work things out from there"...some "basic" requirements has to be met of course (and of course the getting to know each other part)...anything above the basic category should be considered as a bonus...
point is a target has to be set...and a decision has to be made somewhere sometime...once decided...that mentality of meeting someone better later on has GOT to be thrown out of the window...
nobody said it'd be easy...the most impt and most difficult task is taking that first step...and of course saying is one thing...doing is another...
incidentally i ran into a wall in my pursuit of happiness this week...i'll admit that the qualities i possess aren't anything spectacular...i am nice but hell, ANYONE can be nice if they wanted to...i don't speak much...was never much of a talker...
i'm alright if i don't get chosen (who am i kidding?!?!) because of me lacking in certain qualities...what i'm frustrated about is when i cannot even compare to someone who has taken someone else's care and concern for granted not once but TWO frigging times...and yet he can walk all over me with ease at anytime he pleases...
it makes me wonder if anything i do will have any impact at all...is there any point in being the good guy anymore? its like the time when the other guy walked all over me and i lost someone dear to me...deja vu all over again...wtf...
